Aloha! I’m visiting Hawaii again (I swear, this is not my life), this time for vacation and celebration with the whole family.

Before I left, coach Paul over at Epic told me about how he vacations. He told me he hits his workouts hard while traveling, and always comes back fitter than when he left. He got that wistful look on his face and I could tell he was pulling up great memories of swimming, biking, running and Lord knows whatever else while on vacation.

The thought of working out harder than I normally do while kicking back on vacation went over like a lead balloon in my mind. I would never have dreamed of such a thing. There are places to be, things to do, children to tend to. What kind of vacations is this guy going on anyway?

Even despite my initial confusion, the idea stuck with me. It was like a sliver in my brain. Eventually, it nestled its way deep into my programming and I began to think about all the strength I could gain in the ten days we would be gone. I began pulling up images of swimming, hiking and strength training in the gym. Before I knew it, I was researching hikes and workout classes and scoping out places for open-water swims.

What I realize now, is that vacation really is about self-care. If I’m going to go do something rejuvenating and restorative for myself, doesn’t it makes sense that I would honor my body at the same time? Ultimately, I realized exercise is just one way I can take care of myself. It is a gift I am giving myself on a daily basis. It makes total sense to me that a thorough fitness routine while vacationing is one of the best ways I can treat myself.

Now, I see that exercise has given me so much. I am more confident in my body. The confidence isn’t really in appearance, it is trusting that my body will be there for me when I need it. I am restoring the loving relationship I used to have with my body, and that is no small accomplishment. Exercise has reminded me that I am capable, that I am strong and that I can achieve anything I put my mind to.

Given that renewed sense of purpose, my workouts this trip have been based around powerful healing and loving strength. My body isn’t what it used to be, no, but it has brought me here. I am still alive, I am still able to push and get better. I have a lot to be thankful for. I am mindful of that with every move I make toward a stronger, fitter, me.

That thought, and the inspiration I had from Mike and the gang back home, got me through a grueling two hour hike up 1050 stairs to the top of a mountain. It helped me accept where I am today and push hard for a better future. I really feel so fortunate to have finally put the pieces together.

In the end, it turns out I am now the girl that works out harder on vacation. I guess Paul wasn’t crazy for setting the bar high. There is no doubt that he puts it there because he cares about me and wants to see me succeed. Breaking down his intention makes it clear that I should have the same feelings for myself. \

And now, I do.

Give ‘Em Hell