Greatest Love

Once upon a time, I had a little baby. She was small and tiny and vulnerable. She couldn’t do anything for herself, so we provided everything she needed. She is my first child. She is the steel bow of a hardened ship cutting its way through ice topped waters. She is making me yield, opening…

Oh Baby!

I have been long overdue for a medical update. Part of my delay is that I don’t enjoy thinking about my health much anymore now that the “actively fighting disease” part is behind me. I like to leave the medical drama of my life in the past- solidly where it belongs. The other factor, I…

Momma

Be gentle, Momma. I know sometimes this job we have- this job of loving and nourishing and holding our children up- feels like an awfully heavy task. The truth is, it is. It is hard. It sometimes hurts. But remember, that pain is the blossom on love’s sweet vine. A beautiful, prickly, burden we carry…

The Budget Theory

It has been awhile since I’ve technically had cancer. I was declared “no evidence of disease” after chemotherapy ended in July of 2016. Of course, I still went on to have a bilateral mastectomy and 28 doses of radiation. As much as I would like my dance with cancer to be in the history books…

First Fall

What is that little piece of heart ache we all carry with us? That little fractured piece that sits mostly quietly, and then strikes to cut with precision at the most unexpected moment. This may sound sad and woe-some but really it reminds me of the great depth and beauty that is available to me…

Go With The Flow

Our family is currently on vacation with Little Pink Houses of Hope. We were gifted the opportunity to spend a week at Mertle Beach taking in beautiful sites, warm weather and wonderful events tailored just for families like ours. Today we spent the day at the beach. We swam until we were too tired to…

Tears and Fears

Please, for the love of God, can we try to do better? I cannot accept that I live in a country where the best and brightest of us cannot find a way to start chipping away at this behemoth. I cannot accept doing nothing in the face of such overwhelming grief and loss of life. I simply cannot fathom it.

Little Feet

Do you know what joy is? Joy is the feel of my child’s silky hair. It’s the smell of her as she tucks herself into me for the night. It is her little feet pressed into me as we lay entwined together. Do you know what love is? Love is hearing her  whimpering and crying…

Be Here

This won’t be a long post. It certainly won’t be perfect. I’ve shied away from writing lately because I feel like I need to create the perfect circumstances to tap into my creativity. Shockingly, that doesn’t really happen. So tonight I’m honoring the feeling and the moment just as natural and raw as they came…

Who Am I: Part I The Youngest Years

I realized today that while I’ve written a lot about my day to day life, I’ve never shared much about who I was and where I came from. That’s probably a strange way to put it, the past tense “who I was.” But I’ve grown and changed just like everyone else. Mostly, what stands out…

Rain

Today it rained. That’s a big deal in Montana right now. For the past several weeks we have been breathing particulate heavy air. The fires in the state are out of control making the smoke in the air almost unbearable. I lost count awhile back but there is something like 20 fires in Montana that…

Be Well

What is wellness? For me, it is the joining of physical and mental health. The place where both needs intersect and balance is restored. Wellness is having options paired with the capacity and freedom to pursue the path I choose. It is having the integrity of body, mind and soul to move forward.  I’m reminded…